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6 Ways To Beat The Stress of Buying A
DEATH, DIVORCE & MOVING are the three
most stressful experiences in life. There are two very
different kinds of needs that people have while moving.
First there are the transactional needs, like finding the
home that is just right for them, finding a seller who is
realistic, negotiating the price, filling out the paperwork,
handling the escrow, and arranging for the move. But there
are also emotional needs that are involved when moving, and
this is where the biggest stress comes in. Any competent
agent will handle the transactional needs for you, but if
your emotional needs are unfulfilled, you'll be frustrated
and may not act in your own best interests. The ideal real
estate agent is one, who is competent with paperwork and
numbers, but can also guide, direct, and counsel you through
the emotional ups and downs of moving. Here are the six best
ways we've found to beat the stress.
- Begin with the end in mind.
Have an ultimate scenario of where
you're trying to be. What will life be like when you get
there? How will it be better than where you are now?
Dwell on that picture and write it out, fill up at least
a page about how it feels in the new place. This is
imperative. Having the goal in front of you at all times
energizes you to achieve it, in spite of setbacks and
frustrations. Emotions will run high and you need an
anchor. You too must focus on that future goal when
anxiety threatens to get the better of you.
- Be flexible.
In your monetary calculations,
overestimate by a thousand dollars. In this market,
anything can happen between contract acceptance and
closing. It could be the inspections reveal areas of
concern that the seller is unwilling to fix or the
repair costs are higher than the amount limited in the
contract. Or the interest rate changes which affects the
necessary down payment and closing costs you will need
to come up with. As your real estate team, we will
strive to tie up loose ends as quickly as possible, but
remember there is no perfect world. Most buyers feel a
bit overwhelmed when taking on a new mortgage and the
responsibilities of a new home. We've seen many buyers
get angry when it seems like the cost just keeps going
up. Anger is caused when reality doesn't match up with
the expectations you had in your mind. So if you
anticipate this happening in advance, you won't get
angry. In fact, it'll probably go better than you
- Trust in the process.
There's just so much to do, it's
easy to panic. You wonder if it will ever work out. In
fact, when we bought our house, we couldn't eat for a
day, we felt sick to our stomachs! You think you're
taking a big chance, but the truth is you're giving
yourself a big chance. Even though you can't see every
step of the way, as you move towards your goals, the way
opens up. We know that you haven't moved in a long time
and it's a major upheaval in your life. But we've been
there many times before, and we'll be looking out for
you. Trust that we know the way to get you there.
- Get knowledge.
One thing you'll probably feel
during this transition time is being out of control. It
feels like everyone else has taken over your life. The
seller, your lender, the appraiser, the inspectors, they
all have the power to say yes or no to your moving
plans. We'll try our best to let you know ahead of time
what your expenses will be, and what the unknowns are.
We'll tie down the loose ends as soon as possible. We'll
try to get your loan approved within a reasonable time
frame. We'll educate you as best we can and let you in
"behind the scenes" so you won't ever feel stupid or out
- What is your option?
When things don't go as smoothly
as you had hoped, don't let emotions take over. Always
ask yourself "What is my option?" because there are
always options. Let's pretend the lender takes longer
than agreed upon to get your loan. He keeps asking you
for more and more documentation until it feels like he
also needs to know how many gold fillings you have in
your mouth! You feel upset because you wanted to feel
certain about the move and now you still have to live
with the uncertainty. You want to say "Forget it, I'm
fed up with this!" But what is your option? Find a new
lender and start the process over again? That may take
weeks, plus you will have to provide all the paperwork
all over again. If the lender is trying his best, it may
be better to give him a few more days. Each case is
unique, but when setbacks occur we've found that asking
yourself this question helps to defuse the situation and
restore clear headed thinking.
When there's nothing you can do
about the situation, take your mind off of it
altogether. Maybe you expected loan approval on Friday,
but now it won't come until Monday. You hate being in
limbo and feeling powerless. So do something else
entirely, maybe something where you aren't powerless.
Take a hike, play tennis, get out of town for the day,
watch a movie, pray, or pour yourself into your work.
Whatever diversion works best for you, now would be a
good time to engage in it. Just forget the situation and
refuse to listen to those irritating thoughts when they
come into your head. Think about something else instead
and just take it one day at a time. To keep stress to a
minimum, here's how we'll serve you when you work with
us in buying your new home:
- We promise not to take your
business for granted
- We will inform you of your
- We will give you our
best-reasoned expert counsel and advice with your
best interests in mind
- We will clarify your goals and
motivation, so that you can decide if moving is the
wisest choice at this time.
- We will provide recommendations
and information to help your kids through all the
- We will negotiate effectively
for you to get the lowest possible price for your
- We will protect your interests
during escrow, keeping a detailed record of the
- We will be your levelheaded
sounding board or relief valve when the stress is
- We will counsel you through the
feelings of "buyer's remorse"
- We will alert you ahead of time
to every possibility so you feel more in control
- We will contact you daily during
the last 10 days of the transaction to serve your
- We will provide guidance and
help with movers, change of address, utilities shut
off, cleaning, etc. m) we will continue to give you
information of value after the transaction... for